A Love Letter to Kilroy’s Bartenders

Dear Overly Attractive Roy’s Bartenders,

You, beautiful humans, are the best humans. Your water long islands turn my day around. Two dollars, three dollars, so cheap for such joy. Whenever I need those glorious breadsticks, you hook a girl up. Humoring me by ringing the bell when I tip $3 on a $2 drink sets my heart aflutter. Giving me popcorn when I’ve had one too many? You’re really just too kind.

unnamedVegas Bombs, Liquid Cocaines, Texas Lemonades, and Baltimore Zoos—you really know how to pour these too. Your sheer existence makes it easy to ignore the fact that I have $12 left in my bank account, but Tuesdays and Thursdays make that okay. Who knew you could make it so possible to actually be a baller on a budget?

I’m not sure how you tolerate every single thirsty (and I mean that in every way) college student, but you’re the real MVP’s. Thank you for doing you, you’ll keep seeing me.


Every IU Student

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