8 Frat Guys Talk About The Biggest Douche In Their House And It’s Hilarious

A fraternity member on Reddit asked who the biggest douchebag was in everyone’s house and the responses did not disappoint. 

The Question:

Everyone chapter has that one guy who every other brother regrets/wonders how he got a bid. Everything they do seems to border from comic relief to a complete lability for the chapter.

P.S: If you can’t think of one…. it’s probably you.

The Responses:

1. Every once in a while you manage to get a pledge who just falls through the cracks. He does nothing around the house to help out, doesn’t drink, and is just generally a weird dude. Like the other guy said, though, he’s our weird dude.

2. We’ve got a kid who just can’t dress himself, or catch on to social cues whatsoever, and worst off, he has no chill.

Kid will, quite actually, wear like a bright red sleeveless athletic tank, bright red shorts that go like three inches past his knees, tall white socks, and then blue shoes. He doesn’t see anything wrong with that, at all. Now I’m not some fashion snob or anything, but this kid looks like when he went shopping for the first time, and was told to match his outfits and did that way too literally.

He frequently will overstay his welcome in a room by a solid hour. You know those times when you and a girl are hanging out and it’s late and your definitely about to do your thing? Nope. He’s just sitting with you guys toying around on Instagram.

You know those times where you and your best friend are having a deep talk about something really emotional to you both? Nope. He’s going to come in and toy around on Instagram. He will never speak in these situations either, just toy around on Instagram.

He doesn’t drink either. And he gets ridiculously upset when some drunk shenanigans happens. As if he expected any different when living in a Fraternity.

Kid is a Grade A fuck, but he’s our fuck and if anyone tries to fuck with him, we will fuck them up. That’s brotherhood.

3. One of my pledge brothers is the biggest goon I’ve ever met. Chimes in at inappropriate times, makes a fool of himself whenever he drinks, and couldn’t hold himself in a fight against a 120lb girl to save his life… but if anyone who’s not a brother talks shit, they get hit, because nobody fucks with my pledge bro but me.

4. There’s one dude that has brought serious defamation to the chapter. his behavior has turned a bunch of people away from rushing. he’s effected our relationship with the school of music.

the sad thing was he is a great brother, and knows our fraternity inside and out. he’s great internally, but a shame to the outside world. makes me real sad. I hope he grows up.

5. He wasn’t a TERRIBLE person or brother but he consistently smelled bad and was known to creep on girls. Nobody would want him at the house or at parties because he would quite literally scare the girls away. He used to go walk around campus on Friday/Saturday nights not because he had a party to go to, but because he wanted to “intercept” groups of girls on the way to parties or home and follow them.

Fortunately he went abroad for a semester and apparently got some action because he came back with better social skills and hygiene.

6. We had this kid that was just so fucking weird. He needed to be with other people 100% of the time. You’re studying? Doesn’t matter, let’s study together bro! You’re trying to sleep? Come outside and have a cigarette with me! No, what? Dude it’s a free cigarette! He’d offer people rides all the time then try to take them back to his place to hang out. Offers to drive you to the liquor store, on the way back want to come over to my place? Nah dude, I’m hanging out with my girlfriend. Pulls into his apartment complex anyway. One time I was walking to the bar with a brother, he offers us a ride, we take it figuring nothing could go wrong, and he turns onto the fucking interstate. He took us for a 40 minute drive because he didn’t want to go alone. I almost killed him.

During pledging we figured out this kid was a boner. He acted normal around brothers but was a complete and utter fag around us. We didn’t want to tell the brothers because we figured they’d be pissed that we weren’t all acting as a unit. The fucker would go buy like 6 pizzas, bring them over to the house without being asked, then still complain that he got hazed at the next lineup. Before hell week he went to the grocery store, unprompted, and bought a bunch of snacks and shit. IMMEDIATELY the brothers took all the food and ate it. What the fuck do you think was going to happen? He then proceeded to nag everyone for money for that food that we didn’t ask him to buy for months. Fuck that kid.

7. This one guy in my chapter really means well, but he never knows when to stop talking. During chapter meetings, he uses uses obscure parliamentary procedures to get his way, which ends up causing other brothers to get pissed off and extend the length of the meeting. He also comes off really strong. He’s the kinda guy who has extreme/aggressive humor that sort of creeps people out.

As much as he can be a fuck, he’s still a brother so we always look out for each other.

8. Our president. he literally bend the rules to get the position, fucking ruined my chapter. Don’t want anything to do with it.

h/t Reddit/r/frat

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